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  1. 46

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    “The beasts whose blood flows black, threatens our blessed world! Fear the prophecy! Fear the two humans born of the angel's eggs!”

    That was the prophecy that Mel had heard since she was a child. Two humans that held the power to destroy the Gaslight District and drive away the gift of never ending life… and she just happened to be one of them.

    Ken always told her to stay quiet, keep her head down, and kill anyone who got too curious. And she had. Over and over. But secrets were heavy, and Mel was sick of dragging theirs around. She wanted answers—about where she came from, and more importantly, about the other human the prophecy warned of.

    She didn’t have to look for long.

    Their latest heist of stealing an angel's egg from Heaven itself has set everything into motion. Now, the Virtue Corps have sent down an enforcer to put the Smiling Dead crime family in their place.

    Heaven has sent you.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,696
    Chapters:
    17/?
    Comments:
    117
    Kudos:
    385
    Bookmarks:
    46
    Hits:
    9,120
  2. 17

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    “Well… I came up with a brilliant idea.” Mel grinned impishly, mischievous intentions seeping out of her smile. “I thought… since you are clearly the connoisseur of hot women, I'd just borrow yours!”

    “Oooh, so what? Ya found my mags. If ya found em, it isn't the good stuff.” Mud huffed, leaning back in his chair. It was really only a matter of time but that is why, unlike Ken, he had decoy mags hidden in a slightly easier to find spot. He had hid the decoy ones under a crate nearby his sleeping hook which Ken hadn't needed to move in years. Mud wouldn't even be surprised if the decoys had frozen to the icy concrete floor.

    “Oh-ho I wouldn't be so sure of that one.” Mel cackled, eyes glinting against the dark of her devious look. “Tell me, does the headline ‘tin can totally dominates’ mean anything to you?”

    [---CH 8 Preview---]

        Mud…
        Mud…?
        OF COURSE! Diligence sat up with a start and gripped the wiretap in a vice. That piece of shit was wiretapping their hardware! The no good lousy scoundrel! Diligence shook as they fought the urge to swipe everything off their desk and onto the floor. Instead they bolted out of the chair and clawed at the desk, leaving dents in their wake.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    48,621
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    87
    Kudos:
    176
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    3,859
  3. 7

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    “Is there anything I can help you with, my virtue?” Mud asked, the virtue a bit close for comfort. Diligence hummed thoughtfully.

    “There may be one thing. After the last escapade, that you foolishly let happen as the filthy rotten scum you are, I have run into a problem.” Diligence drew close to Mud. Of course he had to be working the same shift Joshua was again. He hadn't noticed considering how fast he gagged him and shoved his decapitated head inside a cabinet drawer. “The Angels graciously blessed me with all of my vitals restored. Truly heavens’ gift. Through no fault of theirs, something went awry with the resurrection.” Mud's ears perked up. A virtue? Having issues? Not to mention, was this the excuse they were giving people? That the virtues were not cursed by the hand but blessed by the angels? “My outsides were replenished flawlessly but my insides? Well…” Diligence brought a hand up to their chest and with a click, half of it opened. Mud's eyes grew wide as he tried to commit what he could see to memory.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,119
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    81
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    744
  4. 5

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    It has been a long time since Diligence has been outsmarted, and by a group of filthy rotlings no less. Luckily, he has a nice, new body to cheer him up after the last one was destroyed in the angel storm.

    Now if only he could get one particular rotling out of his head...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,903
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    43
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    624
  5. 2

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    A sequel to “Staples.”

    About five months after The Smiling Friends- er, Dead, escaped The Virtue Corps with the help of the empathetic young Charity, the New Year approaches. The 10,000th year since The Second Great Flood, in fact.

    However, newly formed and old relationships are tested when a series of bizarre occurrences arise.

    The Angel Mother has an announcement.

    Something comes out of the ocean, with the ability to inflict True Death.

    Repent. The End of The End is Nigh.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,990
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    13
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    366
  6. 4

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    The fallout of the Angel Egg Heist is quick and intense. However, loyalties are tested when old wounds are reopened.

    Prepare to meet all seven Virtues. Prepare to have flesh cut open and hearts ripped in two. Prepare for Hell and Heaven and whatever’s in between.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    76,780
    Chapters:
    12/12
    Comments:
    19
    Kudos:
    38
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    1,437
  7. 4

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    Diligence hates it when Temperance gets hurt.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,370
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    3
    Kudos:
    28
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    299
  8. 12

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    Summary

    Melancholy Hill didn't grow up wanting to attain a criminal record, intentional as her crimes were. But after serving time for a case of assault and battery, despite missing the manic euphoria her acts of carnage gave her, she's ready to start her life over.

    Until a mysterious mark in a graveyard sends her tumbling into a rotting hellish world known as The Gaslight District, where angelic spies refer to her as unholy. Taken in by Ken the Butcher and his gang, the Smiling Dead, Mel is forced to hide her identity and blend in among them. Which becomes harder and harder as the angelic forces watching them suspect a human has arrived.

    As Mel grows accustomed to a world where sin runs rampant, death means nothing, and consequences are felt throughout the eons, she takes to her new criminal life like a fish to water. Once she gets past the garbage and smell of rotting flesh, that is.

    But the Virtues aren't too intent on letting the harbinger of the apocalypse roam as free as she'd like.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,088
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    26
    Bookmarks:
    12
    Hits:
    298
  9. 2

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    The baby grew within the cursed shell. The angel’s egg.

     

    Ken and Temperance kept a close eye as it developed and hatched—healthy and alive it was.

     

    The District doesn’t know. Mud doesn’t know. No one knows the black blooded beast was born again.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,178
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    24
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    185
  10. 8

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    Summary

    But man, proud man,

    Dress'd in a little brief authority,

    Most ignorant of what he's most assur'd—

    His glassy essence—like an angry ape

    Plays such fantastic tricks before high heaven

    As makes the angels weep; who, with our spleens,

    Would all themselves laugh mortal.

    or

    Diligence, Temperence, and the only human child.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,391
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    7
    Kudos:
    56
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    450
  11. 7

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    Summary

    Diligence, before going back to their duties in front of the gates of Paradise Lost, is being summoned by Temperance to his laboratory

    (This takes place a few hours before The Smiling Dead arrives to Paradise Lost!)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,056
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    54
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    457
  12. 6

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    Temperance is doing his best to take care of the human egg, exactly as they had been instructed.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,628
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    28
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    492
  13. 26

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    Summary

    Mud has become obsessed with the Virtue Diligence after their first encounter. And so he finds a way to run into the Virtue again and again and again. The gangster vying for Diligence's attention.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,800
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    77
    Kudos:
    290
    Bookmarks:
    26
    Hits:
    2,909
  14. 18

    Summary

    A series of fics surrounding the Web series' produced by GLITCH productions
    Meta runner
    Sunset Paradise
    Murder Drones
    The Amazing Digital Circus!
    And many more that may come!

    (NO FICS ARE CONNECTED UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED IN THEIR DESCRIPTIONS!)

    Words:
    128,461
    Works:
    11
    Bookmarks:
    18
  15. 4

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    Summary

    Heists never go according to plan and when the guard you're trying to trick is literally called Diligence, some creativity is in order.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,900
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    21
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    777
  16. 7

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    Summary

    “Relieved.” They say as he moves past Mud, not even touching him. Horror dawns on the undead as he realizes the virtue is taking a step into the room, back ramrod straight as they move towards the cameras. As Joshua leaves, Mud puts it together and realizes-

    Fuck, this virtue is the one watching cameras right now. Which means this plan is going to go to shit real quick the longer they look, if he moves his head just a bit to the right and spies the camera with Breadhead, it'll all be over.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,044
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    6
    Kudos:
    79
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    1,157
  17. 2

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    Summary

    “Okay, wise guy! Nit pick me all you want but I don't see the angels on yer ass for the scuffing on yer plating!” Mud yelled and reveled in the virtue hastily scanning themself.”Or, hell, I don’t hear no one complaining about yer ancient, creaky joints which you haven't oiled since the dawn of time!” Diligence instinctively flexed their elbow joint in a movement so small that Mud wouldn't have noticed if it were for the following creeeeakkk.

    “You…” Diligence approached Mud, getting impossibly closer and pulling their posture up to loom over him,”are out. Of. Line.”

    “What are you going to do? Beat me to death while yer joints go creak– eek– errr?” Mud challenged Diligence. Despite the lack of facial expressions given to the virtues, he knew Diligence was steaming in rage. As quick as the rage came, it left and was replaced with something more cheery and smug.

    “Since you clearly know more about robotic upkeep than I do, why not assist your superior officer?”

    “Wha?”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,671
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    69
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    640
  18. 1

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    Summary

    I’m taking requests that follow characters within the Gaslight District! FREED FROM THE SHACKLES OF ANONYMITY!!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    810
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    30
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    608
  19. 2

    Summary

    A series of short stories detailing the various happenings of the titular company.

    Words:
    12,914
    Works:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    2
  20. 2

    Tags
    Summary

    What it says on the box

     

    Fixed the image link!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    13
    Kudos:
    44
    Bookmarks:
    2
    Hits:
    1,243

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