1 - 20 of 106 Works in John Constantine Being an Asshole
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PLEASE let this be a normal field trip (group chat) by alittleinsane
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
06 Oct 2025
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Jason thinks maybe he’s seen all group chats have to offer. Maybe he knows what they are.
But ohhhh boy was he wrong.
There are like, twenty-odd numbers here. Jason knows none of them. What the fuck. Texts flood his phone —his personal phone. How the fuck did that happen and who the fuck did it.
Someone names the chat ‘magic users (vigilantes)’
Someone texts “I’m not a vigilante.”
Someone renames the chat to just a period under the logic, “Too conspicuous and also not entirely accurate.”
Jason wonders if the previous chat name implies that there’s a chat for villains as well.
OR
what if all the silly little magic DC skrunkles had a group chat and jason ended up getting involved lmao
mayyybeee just an excuse for me to expand on all-caste shit -
FruitBat by maplesnmulberries
Fandoms: Batman: Wayne Family Adventures (Webcomic), Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Batman: The Animated Series, Batman and Robin (Comics), Robin: Son of Batman (Comics), Justice League - All Media Types, Justice League & Justice League Unlimited (Cartoons), Justice League of America (Comics), Justice League Dark (Comics)
28 Sep 2025
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Summary
After a magic battle, Bruce gets turned into a literal bat.
His kids take care of him while the Justice League finds a cure.
Series
- Part 6 of Bat Drabbles
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The devil, the justice league… and john by Mythology_Freak87
Fandoms: Lucifer (TV), DCU, Constantine (TV), Justice League - All Media Types, Batman - All Media Types
28 Sep 2025
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Summary
Saw something on tumblr about John annoying Lucifer and decided I was bored enough to write something.
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Запах сірки by XeNone
Fandoms: Constantine (TV), Constantine: The Hellblazer (Comics), Hellblazer & Related Fandoms, Hellblazer, DCU (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics), Arrow (TV 2012), Arrowverse - Fandom
26 Sep 2025
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Роза повертається в Ґотем вперше з того часу, як вчилася тут у старшій школі. Цього разу її сім’ю чекає серйозний виклик — темрява сходить, а значить для магів з сім’ї Костянтин тут завжди знайдеться робота.
Джейсон відчуває, що на його місто насуваються чорні хмари скорої біди, а у повітрі починає тхнути сіркою. Доки він намагається підкорити злочинний світ та піймати усіх щурів за хвости, нові сили підіймають голову. Поступово він розуміє, що потрапив на слизьку стежину, де магія диктує свої правила, проте звернути назад може бути занадто пізно. -
Think I Need Someone Older by waynes
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, DC Extended Universe, Hellblazer
21 Sep 2025
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"'older boyfriend’? Christ, they make me sound like I’m robbing the bloody cradle. I’m only what, twelve years your senior?”
“That’s still not helping you know.”
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The Death of a Peaceful Mind by Dreamweaver312
Fandoms: Danny Phantom, Batman - All Media Types, Justice League - All Media Types, DCU
21 Sep 2025
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Summary
Connor Kent goes back in time to try and stop the war between Earth and the Infinite realms. Unfortunately, his mind isn't processing the deaths he had witnessed or the war he fought in very well. With hundreds of deaths on his hands, his mental state snaps and he takes a more villainous approach the more his mind shatters.
God sent him as karma after all. He was going to destroy the GIW. He was going to hunt down those false heros for sport. He was going to get revenge on Superman for every abuse he was forced to endure.
The lines between Justice and vengeance blur as he figures out his friends are never coming back if he changes the past. His true partners were dead. Dan, Dick? These are different from his people. Copies. He is alone and his sanity is tanking as he believes everything he does is for the greater good of the realms, his former home he can't return to.
Can he fix things? Can he really get them back on his own or will he succumb to causing the end he is trying to prevent? Once he crosses the line is there really any going back?
Series
- Part 2 of Echoes of Betrayal
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Scared to be Separated (Rewrite) by T67
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Nightwing (Comics), Titans (Comics), Teen Titans - All Media Types
15 Sep 2025
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Dick stood alone in the tiny, rundown apartment, the walls smeared with grime and the dim light flickering overhead. Blood coated his hands, splattered across his suit, and dripped onto the cracked linoleum floor.
But the blood wasn't his...
Or: Dick has been stuck in a time loop and has done the unthinkable, Bruce is just confused that his son has sudden separation anxiety.
Series
- Part 3 of Déjà vu
- Part 2 of Oldest Robin, Youngest Titan
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What people do for their soul! by Dark_Nymphs_translates (Dunkle_Nymphen)
Fandoms: DCU (Comics)
08 Sep 2025
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Summary
To get Jason's soul back, Roy and Jason have to do Constantine a favor.
It's as bad as it sounds.Or: Constantine has his fun. Roy and Jason suffer.
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Um Jasons Seele zurückzubekommen, müssen Roy und Jason Constantine einen Gefallen tun.
Es ist genauso schlimm, wie es klingt.oder: Constantine hat seinen Spaß. Roy und Jason nicht.
- Language:
- Deutsch
- Words:
- 1,174
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Hits:
- 5
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Beasts and the beauty by Angels_Watch_you_from_above
Fandoms: Helluva Boss (Web Series), Hellblazer, Constantine: The Hellblazer (Comics), Hellblazer & Related Fandoms, Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics)
06 Sep 2025
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Summary
John and I.M.P. are tasked by a certain dark knight to retrieve one of Batman's rogues who just really isn't in the mood for a fight tonight...
Series
- Part 2 of DC x Hazbin
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,374
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 2
- Hits:
- 39
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[Podfic] The Almost Alien Orphan by Flowerparrish Pods (Flowerparrish) for Nory_Gail
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Danny Phantom, Justice League - All Media Types
30 Aug 2025
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[Audio Length: 22:22]
Can Bruce's day ever go the way it's supposed to?
Podfic of The Almost Alien Orphan by Nory_Gail.
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Or, they argue and Jason puts out a cigarette against Constantine's neck. They're both into it. Oh and Jason punches a fucking wall.
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"These yours?" "Unfortunately." by Angels_Watch_you_from_above
Fandoms: DCU (Comics), DCU, Constantine: The Hellblazer (Comics), Hellblazer & Related Fandoms, Hellblazer, Helluva Boss (Web Series), Superman (Comics), Superman - All Media Types
28 Aug 2025
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Summary
John is enjoying a nice sunrise in Gotham when he gets an unexpected visit from the man of steel himself, who comes to remind John to keep an eye on his friends...
Series
- Part 1 of DC x Hazbin
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Orange Nectar and Cigarette Burns by impulsive_decay
Fandoms: DCU, DCU (Comics), Constantine (TV), Constantine: The Hellblazer (Comics), Constantine (Comics)
18 Aug 2025
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Summary
Constantine gets a roommate with a temperament as difficult as his. He doesn't know what they are, she doesn't know what they are, no one knows what they are and they do not care. Collection of one-shots.
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Tims New Nanny by Cashinx
Fandoms: DCU, DCU (Comics), Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics), Batman: The Animated Series, Batman and Robin (Comics), Robin (Comics), Constantine (2005), Zatanna (Comics)
08 Aug 2025
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Eight-year-old Tim Drake has never met his new nanny She’s too young, too clever, and way too mysterious. She never gets mad, always knows what he’s up to, and sometimes Tim swears reality bends around her. His detective instincts won’t let it go.
Who is she?
Why does she slip into Gotham’s shadows at night?
And why does it feel like she’s watching over him in ways he can’t quite explain?As Tim investigates, he starts uncovering pieces of his new nanny hidden life: her strange connections to Crime Alley, her impossible knowledge, and the eerie sense that something dangerous is following her. But curiosity comes at a price, and when Tim gets too close to the truth, he finds himself in over his head.
Gotham is bigger and darker than he ever imagined.
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The Champion of Magic…Captain Marvel? by ghost_writer616
Fandoms: DCU, Justice League - All Media Types, Shazam! | Captain Marvel (Comics)
12 Jul 2025
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Summary
The JL are summoning the Champion of Magic to fix a Stone(along with all magic in the universe).
Series
- Part 1 of Summoning ‘n shit
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a blessing in disguise by sensibleshroom
Fandoms: Danny Phantom, Batman - All Media Types
12 Jul 2025
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Summary
Danny Fenton has no idea what he's been dragged into. The weird Scottish kid that showed up at the beginning of freshman year has dragged him off to Gotham with promises of meeting his biological family. Which, great. But, Danny can't help but hate him, anyway. It's really hard to be grateful to the person that put Amity Park under a blackout and kept you from calling the Justice League for help when you got sucked into another dimension, after all. Even if he was, like, thirteen when he did that, apparently. It's even harder to trust this Fionn Ainsley when he will tell Danny absolutely nothing about himself.
And now Danny has been adopted by the bats. Like he didn't have enough problems with the Fentons hunting him down like bloodhounds. He wants a nap.
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Dick Grayson (Nightwing) y John Constantine se infiltran en una mansión para investigar una organización misteriosa. Allí, se enfrentan a hombres con máscaras de búho que los atacan. Después de una intensa pelea, Dick es capturado y sometido a un hechizo que lo rejuvenece hasta convertirlo en su versión de Robin.
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Fish Out Of Water by sevenflavorsofbeansauce
Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Justice League - All Media Types
30 Jun 2025
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Summary
During a patrol gone wrong, Batman is hit by a spell that makes him think he's a fish.
Coincidentally, Jason and Dick now have a pet cosplay fish and the burning need to track down an angry magical cosplay shrimp.
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Constant(ly) Strange by ghost_writer616
Fandoms: DCU, Hellblazer, Marvel Cinematic Universe
28 Jun 2025
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Summary
"...What the hell," Strange croaked.
"You're not a demon," Batman said suspiciously.
"No," Strange snapped. "I'm a very busy man who was about to enjoy my morning espresso before someone yanked me across realities." He pointed accusingly at Constantine. "Was this you?"
John raised his hands, grinning. "Well, look who finally crawled out of his multiversal Airbnb."
Or; The JL summoned the sorcerer supreme expecting a powerful maybe demon … they get a tired doctor.
Series
- Part 2 of Summoning ‘n shit